i know this is late because i haven't been on much >.<;
but i just wanted to say these things. though i do believe ari could do this better because of how you mentioned when you want something your siblings get instead and feel overlooked.
i am the lonely type, i've always screwed up and have tried to commit suicide at 8 years old. i had no friends because i moved alot and finally when i did get some friends they just stabbed me in the back everytime. i spent most of second grade and 3rd grade alone in a little play house under the jungle gym, unseen and not wanted.this is why i can relate to tsukasa from .hack//sign i could litterally see myself in her(it's usually why when someone asks about my past i just refer them to that series because it's identical to mine, it's just easier that way than to have to explain everything).
from the tantrums to the loneliness at school and home feeling like a prison just watching tv and old movies.
i don't necessarily have an education either (i only have a 5th grade education but i still understand basic quantum physics and psychology) and for years that held me back from everything and i could only wallow in regret. but finally when i was able to get away from the chaos i was able to see what needed to be done.
but now 22 years old i'm behind in everything and i'm just now trying to move forward, it's hard to say the least but i already knew this. i also have friends that don't want to hurt me and would never backstab me for the first time in my life.
so all i can say is find a place to go to. stay at your grandparents place or a friends for awhile because living in that chaos will and most certainly kill a person or someone else... and lastly don't DIE!! D;<
i won't forgive you if you do! you have a hard life and so did i! so i won't let you die no matter what! as long as i'm still breathing you're not allowed to die.
i swore to myself i would never die after attempting it at 8 years old, so you'll have to endure like i do.
and now alot of you know more about me even though i like to keep these things personal for obvious reason... ;>.>
if you die now who knows what you could be.
my goal is to one day become a voice actor and i would love to learn more about anthropology
*copy/paste from wiki*
"Anthropology is the study of humanity. Anthropology has origins in the natural sciences, the humanities, and the social sciences."